A spiritual warfare within me

This morning, bad memories haunted me again.

I tried to fend it off, I tried to remember the good things, I tried to therapy myself with God's words - His Love, His Grace, His forgiveness, all of His goodness, but I just could not think of any. My thoughts was full of resentment, full of jealously, full of hatred to those people that have caused this deep emotional pain which afflicted me so much.......

As my thoughts was running wild, sub-consciously I knew I need to stop it. But I could not, I was as if tied to the bed - could not get up. I cried, I struggled and finally found the strength to shout - Jesus, Help Me! Immediately, I sat up on my bed. It was as if in a dream, but I knew it was not - a spiritual warfare has just begun....

Immediately, I got up and turn on the computer to the website where I can read all bible verses according to the search tool. I search 'Pure' - do not know why and just anyhow click a page.. This verse appear:-

1 John 3:3
Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure.

I read and thought .... What is this hope to purifies himself?.. And I found more:-
1 John 3 1-3
How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears,[a]we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure.

Oh My Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for Your Holy Spirit to help me to fight this warfare. In the name of Your Son, Jesus, I claimed the Victory You have given me. Thank you Father, leading me to this verses and certainly it has strengthened me and reminded me again, my identity with You, the Hope in You. Lord, I ask for the flow of Your crimson blood to cleanse and remove all the iniquities in me, I ask for Your forgiveness again for I have entertained these things that do not please You. Lord, I know You aware of my desire and teach me to wait and listen to Your gentle voice.... Lord, I want to go on fully with my life as Your woman now as I returned to my singleness. May You use this quality in Your special ways for Your glory in this season of my life... Lord, thank you for your teachings this morning, I know You love me so much........ Amen